Life isn't fair to men.

# Thought 1 #

When we are born, our mother's get the compliments and the flowers.

When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity.

When we die, our widows get the life insurance. What do women want to be liberated from?

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# Thought 2 #


The average man's life consists of

Twenty years of having his mother ask him where

he is going,

Forty years of having his wife ask the same

question;

and at the end,

the mourners wondering too.

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# Thought 3 #

A Man was walking down a street when he heard a
voice from behind, "If you take one more step, a

brick will fall down on your head and kill you."

The man stopped and a big brick fell right
in front of him. The man was astonished.

He went on, and after a while he was going to

cross the road.

Once again the voice shouted, "Stop! Stand still!

If you take one more step a car will run over you,

and you will die."

The man did as he was instructed, just as a car

came careening around the corner, barely missing

him.

The man asked. "Who are you?" "I am your
guardian angel," the voice answered.

"Oh, yeah?" the man asked. "And where the hell were you when I got married?"

Even GOD CANNOT DO SOME THINGS !!

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the sky clouded, and in a booming voice the Lord said,


"Because you have tried to be faithful to me, I will grant you one wish".


The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I
want."


The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormity
of the undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the
Pacific! The concrete and steel it will take! It will nearly exhaust all
the natural resources. It is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things.

Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me".


The man thought about it for a long time.


Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. How she
feels inside, what she's thinking when she's silent? Why she cries, what
she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how to make her truly happy".


The Lord replied, "You want four lanes or six lanes on that bridge